you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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