we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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