In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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