she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
