Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
