Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
