I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
