plz talk dirty to me
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
