you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
