dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I said "one day" and that day is not today
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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