dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
