are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
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