No awkward lesbian experiences without me
im six kinds of drunk right now
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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