I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
i dont even know how to be here
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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