john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
