You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Mom said you looked used
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
