i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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