is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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