You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
