You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
