Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
