just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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