i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
