ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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