check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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