so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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