Betty ford says i'm here all night
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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