I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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