Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Someone came in the potted fern
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
