he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
