Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
