Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
Randomize