I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
