he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
