Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Semen is not good for contacts.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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