You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Randomize
