So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
