You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
