I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
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