I scissor kicked a one legged man last night.
He was trying to put me in handcuffs.
You have my attention.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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