She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
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