some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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