As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You need Xanax blowdarts
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
