Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
