Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize