is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Randomize
