Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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