kristin has been a bad kristin
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
