Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
