after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
